Country of Origin :?Hungary
國(guó)籍:匈牙利
Occupation :?Director of Hungarian Technology Center
職業(yè):匈牙利技術(shù)中心主任
Years in China :?13?years
在華居住時(shí)間:13年
My China story starts in 2007 in Hungary, where I was teaching international political economy at the Corvinus University of Budapest, and researching public economic policy issues in a think-tank. I was in a relationship for 4 years, I owned a small flat and a car, and lived in a nice environment with my beloved in the green Buda side of the capital city. So I had an ongoing academic career, close to finishing my PhD at the International Relations program, and had what we can call a normal life.
我的中國(guó)故事還要從 2007 年的匈牙利講起,當(dāng)時(shí)我在布達(dá)佩斯的科維努斯大學(xué)教授國(guó)際政治經(jīng)濟(jì)學(xué),還在一個(gè)智庫(kù)研究公共經(jīng)濟(jì)政策問(wèn)題。當(dāng)時(shí)我正在談一段維持四年的感情,擁有一套小公寓和一輛小車,和我的女友住在樹(shù)木繁茂的布達(dá)城區(qū)。我正在進(jìn)行學(xué)術(shù)研究,即將取得國(guó)際關(guān)系博士學(xué)位,過(guò)著正常的生活。
A year before, I had started to work on China-related topics, researching mainly Hungarian-Chinese relations and China related issues in Hungary. But I had never visited China, didn’t speak the language, didn’t know the culture too much, only some part of the history, and contemporary relations. An idea came to me about visiting China to learn the language and culture, so I searched for funds and applied for several scholarships, but I only got refusal. Later I got support from the think-tank boss. He agreed that if I went to China to learn the language, I could work remotely for their foundation and could finance myself in this way. So, I decided to travel to China for a year, and enrolled in a language program in Shenzhen University.
一年前我開(kāi)始研究與中國(guó)有關(guān)的課題,主要研究匈中關(guān)系以及與匈牙利相關(guān)的中國(guó)問(wèn)題。我從來(lái)沒(méi)有來(lái)過(guò)中國(guó),不會(huì)說(shuō)漢語(yǔ),對(duì)中國(guó)文化也不是很了解,只懂得一些中國(guó)歷史和當(dāng)今世界的國(guó)際關(guān)系。我腦海里萌生了一個(gè)想法,我要來(lái)中國(guó)學(xué)習(xí)語(yǔ)言和文化,為了獲得資金,我申請(qǐng)了幾個(gè)獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金,但都沒(méi)有通過(guò)。后來(lái)我得到了智庫(kù)老板的支持,他說(shuō)如果我去中國(guó)學(xué)習(xí)漢語(yǔ),我可以在線上為他們的基金會(huì)工作,從而獲得資金支持。于是,我決定留學(xué)中國(guó)一年,在深圳大學(xué)學(xué)習(xí)漢語(yǔ)。
I asked for one year leave at the university, changed my status at the foundation research team to online researcher, and travelled to Shenzhen in September 2008. When I arrived, I only could say ni hao, so everything was new and strange. I lived in the campus for a year, learnt the language with enthusiasm, started a blog to keep in touch with my family and friends, and slowly started to know Shenzhen, my new home, better. My plan was to study the language as much as I could, and after a year, travel back to Hungary and continue the old life I had left there.
我向?qū)W校請(qǐng)了一年的假,把我在基金會(huì)研究小組的身份改為線上研究員。我于2008 年 9 月來(lái)到深圳。剛到深圳時(shí),我只會(huì)說(shuō)“你好”,一切都很新鮮和陌生。我在學(xué)校里住了一年,滿懷激情地學(xué)習(xí)漢語(yǔ)。我還開(kāi)通了博客,與家人和朋友保持聯(lián)系。我也慢慢熟悉深圳,我的新家。我計(jì)劃是盡力學(xué)習(xí)漢語(yǔ),一年后再回到匈牙利,回到以前的生活。
I got used to the new circumstances very quickly, and studied hard. For the winter break I travelled back home to meet my family and to make an end to my previous relationship. After a time, I realized that I could not go on in that relationship, and we agreed to finish that journey together. Then I travelled back to Shenzhen, now as a single man, and continued my studies.In the spring time another call came: extending my stay in China for another year, joining the team of the China High Tech Fair (CHTF) organizing committee and becoming responsible for the Hungarian-Chinese relations and technology cooperation. It also meant to give up my academic career and at least delay my PhD thesis issues. The decision was not easy, but I chose to make a big turn in my life. Soon after this my online research work ended too, so I was related to only my limited salary in Shenzhen and savings for the next year.
我很快就適應(yīng)了新環(huán)境,并努力學(xué)習(xí)。寒假期間,我回了趟國(guó),見(jiàn)我的家人,與女友分手。一段時(shí)間后,我意識(shí)到我們已經(jīng)無(wú)法繼續(xù)走下去,所以我們同意一起結(jié)束這段關(guān)系。我恢復(fù)單身,回到深圳,繼續(xù)我的學(xué)業(yè)。春季,又有一個(gè)電話打來(lái):讓我在中國(guó)再待一年,加入中國(guó)高交會(huì)(CHTF)組委會(huì),負(fù)責(zé)匈中關(guān)系和技術(shù)合作。這也意味著要放棄我的學(xué)術(shù)生涯,至少我的博士論文寫(xiě)作要延后了。這是一個(gè)艱難的決定,我的生活迎來(lái)了大轉(zhuǎn)變。不久,我的在線研究工作也結(jié)束了,我在深圳只剩下有限的工資和只夠用到明年的積蓄。
After a year at the CHTF I faced another challenge, how to go on. Go back to Hungary, and start a new life there? Staying in Shenzhen and finding a new job? Joining one of the teams of English teachers, and seeing how can I survive? Or applying to be a university teacher teaching economics again? There were channels for these, but finally I didn’t choose any of them. I joined a small consultancy company to be the project manager of the international trade section, handling the export-import between China and Hungary, being the contact person for the Hungarian partners. Before I was teaching international economics theory, but now I was?on the field, the connection point between sellers and buyers, checking exchange rates, delivery fees, handling failures and upset customers, and so on.
在 CHTF 工作一年后,我面臨另一個(gè)問(wèn)題,那就是我將何去何從?;氐叫傺览_(kāi)始新的生活?留在深圳,找一份新的工作?找一份英語(yǔ)老師的工作,看我能否勝任?或者再申請(qǐng)當(dāng)大學(xué)老師,教經(jīng)濟(jì)學(xué)?這些都是謀生之道,但我都沒(méi)有選擇任何一條。我進(jìn)入了一家小型咨詢公司,擔(dān)任國(guó)際貿(mào)易部的項(xiàng)目經(jīng)理,處理中國(guó)和匈牙利之間的進(jìn)出口,是匈牙利合作伙伴的聯(lián)系人。以前我是教國(guó)際經(jīng)濟(jì)理論的,但我現(xiàn)在開(kāi)始實(shí)踐,成為買賣雙方的中間人,檢查匯率、交貨費(fèi),處理失敗的交易,平息煩躁的客戶等等。
The owner and director of the small company was a Uighur Chinese guy, who had lived and studied in Hungary before, could speak the language perfectly, and also worked as an interpreter. He became my mentor, although in the beginning he didn’t think our relationship would be so long. He offered me a temporary job to try, with a lower salary, until I could find something better for myself. But after three months of work in his team he came to me one day and said that I didn’t need to go on searching for a new job, he wanted me there permanently. So, we became colleagues, he became my boss, and slowly became friends too. How to do the business in China – I learnt all the mysteries from him. Sometimes we laughed, sometimes we were upset and had some struggles, but went through the stages we had to.
這家小公司的老板兼董事是維吾爾人,以前在匈牙利生活和學(xué)習(xí)過(guò),會(huì)講一口非常流利的匈牙利語(yǔ),還做過(guò)口譯。他成了我事業(yè)上的導(dǎo)師,但一開(kāi)始他認(rèn)為我們“師徒”關(guān)系不會(huì)長(zhǎng)久。在我找到更合適的工作之前,他給了我一份臨時(shí)工作,讓我嘗試一下,工資比較低。在他的團(tuán)隊(duì)里工作三個(gè)月后,有一天他說(shuō)我不用再找工作了,他希望我留在這里一直干下去。于是,我們成了同事,他成了我的老板,慢慢成了朋友。如何在中國(guó)做生意——我從他那里學(xué)到了所有的奧秘。我們有歡笑,有難過(guò),也有過(guò)艱難的時(shí)刻,但我們都挺過(guò)去了。
He gave me free hand and many suggestions, but didn’t direct me on a daily basis, let me learn and grow by myself. When I had questions I asked, or when I had suggestions on how to do it better or differently, I suggested, and we grew together. He gave me better and better conditions and I was working harder and harder. Later, I also helped him a lot in his attempts to do technology transfer between the two countries, but we didn’t have too much success, the positive parts came mainly from the trading.
他放手讓我自己干,提了很多建議,但并沒(méi)有每天指導(dǎo)我,而是讓我自己學(xué)習(xí)和成長(zhǎng)。有問(wèn)題的時(shí)候就請(qǐng)教他,如果我覺(jué)得哪方面可以改進(jìn),我就向他提建議,我們齊頭并進(jìn)。他給我的條件越來(lái)越好,我工作也越來(lái)越努力。后來(lái)我還幫助他嘗試在兩國(guó)之間進(jìn)行技術(shù)轉(zhuǎn)讓,我們沒(méi)有非常成功,只是在貿(mào)易方面有所收獲。
I got initiations not just to the business, but also to the business culture in China. If you want to do good business here, then it’s not enough to have meetings and agreements, but also dinners and lunches, drinking wine and baijiu, representing your company and country, and many more. I took the obstacles and challenges and later was?made partner in the company. I also started my own business line, selling Hungarian wines in China, and helped out in many projects, many times worked hard at the evenings and weekends too. After a while I realized that in a way, I was doing the same as before in Hungary: I worked more and more, my relationships were not as deep as could be, many of them quite superficial, and I was not happy, just pretending to be. Although the business went well, I had some savings again, and everything seemed ok, actually I didn’t feel I was on the right track. I felt something is missing, but couldn’t recognize what exactly.
我收獲的不僅是更強(qiáng)的業(yè)務(wù)能力,更對(duì)中國(guó)的商業(yè)文化有所了解。如果你想在這里做好生意,開(kāi)會(huì)、簽合同是遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)不夠的,你還需要應(yīng)酬,包括吃飯喝酒,代表的是你的公司和國(guó)家。我克服了這些挑戰(zhàn),成為公司的合伙人。我也開(kāi)辟了自己的業(yè)務(wù),在中國(guó)銷售匈牙利葡萄酒,幫助公司完成許多項(xiàng)目,很多晚上和周末也要努力加班。一段時(shí)間后,我意識(shí)到,我做的事情和以前在匈牙利一樣。我工作越來(lái)越多,但人際交往卻越來(lái)越膚淺,我并不快樂(lè),只是假裝快樂(lè)。雖然生意做得很好,攢了一些積蓄,一切似乎都很好,實(shí)際上我覺(jué)得自己并不在一個(gè)正確的軌道上。我總覺(jué)得缺了點(diǎn)什么,但又不懂到底缺少什么。
Some bigger business issues came, what were clear signs of the fragility of this whole system we built up. We lost some money here and there, some customers didn’t take responsibility for their decisions and didn’t pay back their part, then later my partner found himself in a bigger financial trouble that he couldn’t solve. So, in 2017 I was in a situation again to decide between quitting and leaving everything behind, moving back to Hungary with a bitter taste in my mouth and acknowledging that it’s over or staying and persevering. I didn’t get rich, didn’t redeem the business and wine world in China, so I could start all over again in Hungary.
業(yè)務(wù)上出現(xiàn)了一些大問(wèn)題,這些問(wèn)題說(shuō)明我們建立的體系非常脆弱。公司許多業(yè)務(wù)都在虧損,一些客戶出爾反爾,沒(méi)有償還他們的金額,后來(lái)我的伙伴發(fā)現(xiàn)自己陷入了一個(gè)更大的財(cái)務(wù)困境,他無(wú)法脫身。因此,2017 年,我再次考慮辭職,拋下一切,返回匈牙利,雖然有點(diǎn)苦澀,但是我承認(rèn)一切都結(jié)束了。我沒(méi)有發(fā)家致富,沒(méi)有挽回在中國(guó)的生意,沒(méi)有救活中國(guó)的葡萄酒市場(chǎng),我想在匈牙利從頭再來(lái)。
Eventually, I decided not to quit. Instead, I did everything for standing up, saving what I had and keeping alive what I can, giving hope and salary also to my colleagues. Until this moment I was a kind of second man behind the boss, and if something happened the boss protected me and the business too, but now the boss had disappeared and I had to grow up in a fast rhythm, making big decisions, setting up directions, and being fully responsible for myself and for my colleagues’ decisions, mistakes too. Needed to take on conflicts, talk to some business partners hardly and firmly, and giving up some connections too.
但是,我最終決定不辭職,我要東山再起,保護(hù)我所擁有的,保持我所能保持的,給我的同事創(chuàng)造希望,帶來(lái)收益。之前,我站在老板身后,如果發(fā)生什么事,老板也會(huì)保護(hù)我和企業(yè),但現(xiàn)在老板不在了,我必須迅速成長(zhǎng),自己做重要的決策,制定公司前進(jìn)的方向,對(duì)自己和同事的決定、錯(cuò)誤完全負(fù)責(zé)。我還需要化解沖突,認(rèn)真對(duì)待一些商業(yè)伙伴,也需要放棄一些曾經(jīng)的伙伴。
Besides, this was the year when I first visited Chiang Mai, and participated in an esoteric tantric yoga retreat, and got to know my current yoga teachers and the whole community in Asia. I joined their online courses, and when I had time and chance I visited them in Thailand, to dive deeper in this fantastic world of tantric yoga. After this first retreat, I decided to start practicing these teachings on a daily basis. I had practiced yoga before, but not consistently, and not with good directions, so it was a huge step for me to do this one hour per day, without missing a day. Fortunately, I got a massive support for this big change in my life from my new spiritual family.
也是在這一年,我第一次去了泰國(guó)清邁,參加了一個(gè)神秘的密宗瑜伽靜修營(yíng),開(kāi)始了解我現(xiàn)在的瑜伽老師和整個(gè)亞洲社會(huì)。我參加了他們的在線課程,我一有時(shí)間和機(jī)會(huì),就去泰國(guó)拜訪他們,深入了解這個(gè)奇妙的密宗世界。第一次靜修之后,我每天溫習(xí)這些教義。我以前也練過(guò)瑜伽,但沒(méi)有堅(jiān)持下來(lái),也沒(méi)有方向,所以對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō),每天練一小時(shí),一天不落,就是一個(gè)巨大的進(jìn)步。幸運(yùn)的是,我遇到了精神上的家人,我做出改變,他們給了我巨大的支持。
When I started my spiritual journey with Mahasiddha yoga school, I weighed 88kg. Back then, I didn’t do any daily practice on a daily basis, I was drinking alcohol several days a week, was eating meat almost on a daily basis, didn’t pay too much attention to my diet, and my consciousness level of my everyday life was very low, limited to surviving.
我在瑪哈悉達(dá)瑜伽學(xué)校開(kāi)始我的精神之旅時(shí),我有 88 公斤,每天都不做任何日常練習(xí),每周都會(huì)喝幾次酒,幾乎每天都在吃肉,對(duì)我的飲食沒(méi)有太多關(guān)注,對(duì)日常生活沒(méi)有追求,“活著”就行。當(dāng)然,我還假裝我很享受生活。
With these new practices and concepts, my life started to change radically. Still, I felt that this change was too slow, and sometimes didn’t feel any change at all, but looking back to these last 3-4 years I can see the transformation clearly. On one hand, I started to do more and more practice daily, change my time from ordinary, meaningless things to spiritual practice. I started to participate in spiritual challenges, with the very clear target to grow and transform. On the other hand, I started to leave behind some bad habits, changed my diet, reduced my alcohol intake, and introduced new good habits. The result was stunning both physically and mentally. I lost 13-15kg in two years, and could keep this level in a long term, without any problem. I levelled up my practice to 2-3 hours, later more, and changed my priorities in the daily life: put the spiritual practice at front, and the business as second.
學(xué)習(xí)了這些新的瑜伽動(dòng)作和理念后,我的生活開(kāi)始發(fā)生根本性的變化。我仍然覺(jué)得這種變化太慢了,有時(shí)根本感覺(jué)不到任何變化,但回顧過(guò)去這三四年,我可以清楚地看到這種轉(zhuǎn)變。一方面,我每天做越來(lái)越多的瑜伽,不再做普通的、無(wú)意義的事情,而是做精神上的練習(xí)。開(kāi)始參加靈修挑戰(zhàn)賽,目標(biāo)非常明確,就是為了成長(zhǎng)和轉(zhuǎn)變。另一方面,我開(kāi)始拋棄一些壞習(xí)慣,改變飲食習(xí)慣,少喝酒,培養(yǎng)好習(xí)慣。身體上和精神上都發(fā)生了驚人的轉(zhuǎn)變。我在兩年內(nèi)減掉了 13-15 公斤,能長(zhǎng)期保持這樣的減重速度,沒(méi)有任何問(wèn)題。我每天瑜伽時(shí)間增加到 2-3 小時(shí),循序漸進(jìn),把精神練習(xí)放在第一位,而把事業(yè)放在第二位。
I got and still get many supports and help from my teachers, from my classmates, from my girlfriend, Nicole, who is also a yoga practitioner and certified teacher, and from my assistant, Nancy, who is not just supporting my business steps, but also a good friend. I cannot say enough thanks to all of them, and those many more friends I met and got many kinds of support in the last 13 years. All this journey is full of ups and downs, and I couldn’t be here without them. New friendships and brotherhood are formed to fight with my real enemy, that finally I found: it is myself. It is my monkey mind, with whom I am fighting on a daily basis, with more or less success. This is the ultimate fight, to learn to silence the mind, control the ego, learn to be selfless and humble, and value all the relationships and feedbacks as teachers in life.
我從我的老師和同學(xué)還有我的女朋友 Nicole(她也是一個(gè)瑜伽練習(xí)者和教師)、助手 Nancy(她不僅是我業(yè)務(wù)上的助手,也是我的好朋友)身上得到了許多支持和幫助。我感謝他們所有人,也感謝過(guò)去 13 年中我遇到的朋友,我得到了各種支持,感激之情難以言表。這段旅程充滿了坎坷,沒(méi)有他們我就不能走到這里。結(jié)交朋友是為了與真正的敵人作斗爭(zhēng),我最終發(fā)現(xiàn):敵人就是我自己。我心里存在一只為所欲為的猴子,每天都在與之斗爭(zhēng),多少取得了成功。這是一場(chǎng)決斗,要學(xué)會(huì)讓頭腦冷靜下來(lái),學(xué)會(huì)自我控制,學(xué)會(huì)無(wú)私和謙遜,珍惜各種關(guān)系,把它們當(dāng)作生活中的老師。祝愿各位都能找到自己此生的目標(biāo),以熱情和愛(ài)來(lái)實(shí)現(xiàn)這個(gè)的目標(biāo)!
作者:Szabolcs Szajp?翻譯:潘澤彬
If you would like to contribute your story, feel free to contact us.
Email: luz@mts-tech.com